A Mallorca wedding photographer’s worst fears (aka nightmares I pretend not to have)

Ok, this is not Mallorca, it’s Italy, but this day represents to me when everything just flows… Many thanks to the planner Eventitalien.

Being a wedding photographer in Mallorca is a dream. The golden light, the stunning venues, the heartfelt moments… But even in paradise, we’re not immune to the occasional Oh no no no no no moments—those tiny fears that sneak into our minds at 3am before a big wedding. Or mid week, weeks in advance…

So, for transparency, a bit of fun, and maybe a few nervous laughs…here are some of the worst nightmares that haunt us wedding photographers. And yes, we still love the job more than anything!

1. The card corruption catastrophe

Imagine this: the ceremony just ended, everyone is crying, hugging, and the light was perfect. You sit down to back up your memory cards and… nothing. One of them is unreadable. Gulp.

Nightmare rating: 10/10
Reality check: This is why I shoot on dual card slots. And have backup systems. And backup-backups. A 30TB NAS, 9TB on Dropbox, and a few SSD’s… and sometimes all of this doesn’t feel enough 😅

2. Getting stuck in traffic

Mallorca’s scenic backroads are charming… until you're behind a slow-moving tractor or a big group of cyclists that forgot to hire a guide…
Worst-case scenario? Arriving late. (Just typing that gives me chills.)

Nightmare rating: 9/10
Reality check: We always leave early, and count for traffic.

3. The disappearing couple

You’re ready for portraits. The light is dreamy. And the couple? Nowhere to be found. Turns out someone handed them cocktails and they’re mingling like royalty. Which is lovely,but also... the sun is setting!!!

Nightmare rating: 8/10
Reality check: I always gently plan buffer time. But yes, I do occasionally go on a mission to locate missing grooms. It’s usually the grooms… 😅

4. The overly enthusiastic Uncle Bob

You know the one. They has a DSLR, a flash mounted like a spaceship, and zero awareness that they just walked into every shot during the vows.
Or they tell the couple how to pose.
Or both.

Nightmare rating: 7/10
Reality check: A friendly chat before the ceremony usually helps. And if not, it is what it is. I’m also here to document and I can’t dodge every guest with a camera or a phone in the air.

5. Rain. Without a Plan B.

Mallorca is known for sunshine. We actually can enjoy 300 days per year of it. But every once in a while… surprise! Tropical-style rain. And no backup plan in sight. Cue panic.

Nightmare rating: 6/10
Reality check: I bring umbrellas. I scout backup portrait spots. And honestly? Rainy weddings can be magic. And I just don’t say that. It’s 100 true.

6. The gear fail moment

You double-checked your gear the night before. Everything was charged and cleaned. Then suddenly your main camera stops focusing during the first kiss.

Nightmare rating: 11/10
Reality check: This is why professionals carry two (or three) cameras. We’re basically a mobile studio. And this actually happened to me during a wedding. Not for the kiss though, but I noticed during the getting ready moments.

7. Being mistaken for someone else

I always try to blend it with the guests, without overdoing it. But once I was asked by a guest to remove a water hose from the lawn. I’m not sure how I was mistaken for the gardener, but it happened… And sure, I few times I’ve had to clean up where the staff has missed stuff. But I’d love to now have to put down my gear to move heavy pool cleaning equipment.

Nightmare rating: 3/10
Reality check: Smile. Politely explain. Carry on.

8. The wrong date in the calendar

OK. This one is rare. But it haunts us all. That one moment of panic when you wake up and think “IS THE WEDDING TODAY?!”
You grab your phone and, phew. It's tomorrow.

Nightmare rating: 15/10
Reality check: Calendar check rituals are real. And I confirm with couples before every wedding week. This one almost happened to me actually, for an elopement, as we had been discussing different dates. Luckily my booking system sends out automatic reminders, and this way my couple noticed it. Phew…

Why I still love being a wedding photographer in Mallorca

Sure, after an intense week, I feel sometimes that I might not be able to sustain this lifestyle for years and years. But that passes rather quickly. The moment I see what I created, those feelings magically vanish.

Despite these fears, I wouldn’t trade this job for anything. The emotions, the artistry, the trust you place in me… It’s a huge honour.

And with a bit of planning, a healthy dose of professionalism (and snacks), these fears stay in the “what if” category, not the reality.

But just know: behind every calm, smiling photographer… there’s someone who’s already imagined 57 worst-case scenarios.

And planned for them all.